A renewal... WARNING!!! This one is lengthy!

Of purpose, of spirit, of hope and joy, of a clear direction to move in...

That is what I felt this weekend as a result of attending Time Out For Women in Rochester.

IT WAS WONDERFUL!

The process started for me a long time ago when my friend Tennisa a good friend from high school, emailed asking if I wanted to be a team leader... how could I turn her down?  And, why NOT throw another 'to do' on my list!?  I really had few responsibilities, and they compared little to the payoff...  being at TOFW...  I had been once before, in Toronto, but this experience was different, also being behind the scenes a bit.  I got to help find women to spread the word about the event and at the event helped in small, but important ways.  I love being with other women!  I loved greeting these women, taking photos of them, feeling of their spirits, not even knowing who they were. 

This spring I went to a concert... because Shawn had box tickets... we three couples chuckled to ourselves as we headed to New Kids On The Block/Back Street Boys in concert!  (Hind sight, this was not the best choice for me... it really affected the marathon I was scheduled to run the following morning!  But that is another post!)  Um, did we fit in?  Well of course!  Our age is the group that actually know these people!  Hoards of women came to that concert!  As we stood up above all of the ladies, and few gentlemen.  My arms were covered in chills as the announcer announced the concert and the event erupted with screams.  The energy was immense.  I totally got the chills from head to toe.  I thought to myself, how could you NOT love this?  This would totally be an addictive feeling, all of that energy, just for you...  Being a performer myself I can relate on a much smaller scale of course.  The applause at the end of a dance performance is thrilling.  It puttered out after a while and we had had it before it all ended.  Unsustainable.

I contrast that with the feeling I felt as I watched excited women of every age line up at the doors for this very different event.  Their eyes were aglow, their excitement was sure, they came really early!!!  As the event started I walked up the stairs to say the opening prayer.  As I bowed my head, with over a thousand other women, and started to speak to our Heavenly Father a wave flooded over me.  My heart pounded, the tears fell from my eyes and my body tingled from head to toe.  Not one of them was speaking, but I felt their energy, their spirit.  There is a power in faithful, beautiful, virtuous women who seek their God and His will.  This power is sustainable, it is one that will be with us as long as we will seek it.  It clears our mind and hearts, it empowers us, it guides us on our journey.  It was such a treat to bathe in that power for a day and a half, truly rewarding and a wonderful renewal.

Friday night we listened to Dallyn Bayles as well as John Bytheway.  Sherri Dew was scheduled to come, but got sick.  It was a little disappointing, I think that happened in Toronto too.  BUT, I got what I needed and was very happy with John Bytheway.  Certainly each of us that attended got what we needed from it.  The words I needed to hear, that will sustain me and renew my efforts are these...

(Dallyn Bayles song)

- If I reach you, will you teach me, for you know better than I. 

Keep reaching and keep seeking.  We are all love starved in this journey of life and only our Heavenly Father, through his son Jesus Christ can fulfill that for us.  I feel most alone when I am not reaching to Him.

(John Bytheway... two talks)

- Time Out (in sports) used to breath, receive encouragement, receive instruction. 

TAKE TIME OUTs!  I need them.  I have been told countless times where to go to get my instructions, make the time.

- What am I marinading in?  What that meat sits in it soaks up and becomes.  And, just a dip into gasoline would change the flavor of that meat.  Check it out!

- Some talks I want to go back and study that he made reference to.

- Stop look and listen.  I get busy with all of my other 'things' been trying to make more of an effort right when kids get home to be completely available to them.  Stop, look and listen.

- Be my best self at home. 

- Night routine... I'll post more on that later...

I really didn't want to leave.  As I sat there I thought that I want my home to feel like this all of the time.  It is me who will bring it in.  Am I making effort?  Sometimes it seems so big and daunting to do on my own.  I CAN!  I will!  Priorities!

After the presenters were done we cleaned up for the evening and went back to our hotel.  I wanted to hang out with the fabulous women in my ward, but also wanted to stay with Tess, I never get to see her!  I opted for the latter.  We ate Grape pie with some others from the tour, then she and I went to our room and talked until our eyes could stay open no longer!

We were up way to early to get ready for the day.  Tess went down to check out while I finished getting ready.  As I was waiting for the elevator I heard voices approaching, and round the corner came Hilary Weeks and Kris Belcher.  I was a little star struck!  They are beautiful women!  I loved rubbing shoulders with them and getting to know them a little.  Great women!

We got our assignments for the morning and prepared to start another wonderful day.  We got to hand out the fabulous tote bag, there was much excitement about that!  I took more photos, helped out, talked to ladies.  Loved it!

We had wonderful presenters... Hilary Weeks, DeAnn Flynn, Kris Belcher, Mary Ellen Edmunds, Wendy Ulrich, Anthony Sweat.

I had to help out and didn't get to sit through all of them, but again, this is what I came away with...

(DeAnn Flynn)

-The mother's mite, I am only me and can become better, but need to have faith in the little bits I bring.  The Lord will make up the rest.  My little bits will make a difference (mostly my spiritual bits) to my children.

(Mary Ellen Edmunds) only caught pieces

- He knows me!  And that matters!  I can get caught up in what matters to the world.  What matters is the Lord.

(Wendy Ulrich) only caught pieces

- Great tips to be happy.  Meaningful conversations and gratitude/reflection stuck out to me...check out this link: Happiness.

(Hilary Weeks)

- Love her music, she has a wonderful personality.

- Where am I focusing my energy? All too often it's on those few negative things in my life. Change that! AND, the view from the mountains I climb are always worth it. His promises are sure!

(Kris Belcher)

- Big fat tummy ache from laughing so hard.

- As I sat and watched this beautiful woman I wondered if she got tired of the jokes, her schpill to all of us. She is very honest about how much it brought her down to lose her sight. I appreciate that. I'm sure that it still stinks from time to time, and like the struggles I face right now, it's ok and I can laugh about it and feel fine about it... I can't change it, but then it stinks again, and it may over and over again. BUT, as long as I can feel the love of the Lord through out the journey I'm ok. Keep seeking Him.

(Anthony Sweat)

- Our challenges are specific to each of us. God is fair to each of us. Don't compare, it really is fair...

It was wonderful! I stole Tess after and we headed back to Buffalo for some much needed girl time! I loved having her here in my home, to see my life. We stopped at Bravo for such a delicious dinner, then JoAnn's to get crafties, then home to visit and create.

I loved this weekend. My heart and soul needed it. I feel renewed. I will be back with some specifics on what I want to become, and how I will get there. Thanks TOFW!